Wolfowitz Drafts Justice League for Iraq

Undersecretary of State Paul Wolfowitz poses with members of the Justice League of America who will be taking the reigns from US troops in Iraq.

7/31/03: Under pressure from Senators in both parties to explain how the White House intends to carry out operations in Iraq with no additional funding Undersecretary of State Paul Wolfowitz announced that the Justice League of America is being dispatched to the war-torn country.

“They have their own source of funding, and bringing about world peace is what they're supposed to do,” Wolfowitz told a panel of somewhat skeptical Senators.

“Superman and Batman can really kick ass, and we think the Green Lantern can flush out Saddam with that crazy ring of his,” Wolfowitz added. “Aquaman can't do a hell of a lot because it's a desert and all, but Wonder Woman will type the reports a hell of a lot faster than the troops do, and she makes a mean cup of coffee too.”